So many mixed emotions............Questions needing answers. Does a person love or do they hate???? One could feel like two-face off Batman...one side pushes to love and embrace, the other pushes to hate and isolation. How can you love a person that shows nothing but disgust, hatred and unforgiveness towards you? You refuse to love me because of your own insecurities, fears and mistakes.
Was it a mistake? Yes. Was it manipulation? Yes. Was it deception? Yes. The answer to all your wondering thoughts:
Whenever you find yourself in an abusive situation, it is never the fault of the person being abused. A lot of times victims of abuse (verbal, emotional, physical, financial, sexual) blame themselves for what happened. One may say: what if I didn't...I should have done...did I cause this...was it my fault.............NO it wasn't YOUR fault! Most abusers know the person who abused them, which causes mixed emotions. You love them, but you hate them. How can someone I love do something so hateful? This causes you to not trust and love others. One finds themselves having mental and emotional issues, which can cripple a persons spirituality. You may be reading this and see yourself, asking "Yes this is ME". How can I get pass these emotions?
- Forgive Yourself - recognize that it was not your fault, you did nothing to cause this, what they did to you was of their own accord
- Release the Shame
- Seek counseling
- Allow yourself to heal
Deal with YOU! Love YOU! Allow yourself to be free from emotional and psychological damage! You are NOT what happened to YOU! You are LOVED, You can be LOVED, You can show LOVE!
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*TEARS* I love what i should hate and i knw i shouldnt but i gets no love from my family, friends and sometimes feel no love from God.....im alone and its like it doesnt matter to anyone that its hard for me....y wasnt my mom there?? y wasnt my dad there?? y didnt knw one love me thru this tha right way??
ReplyDeleteGod still loves you, no matter what, even when we don't feel it. At times we feel alone because no one seems to understand what we feel or have to deal with on a daily basis. There are many reason why your mom or dad may not have been there. It could have been some things that they were dealing with at that time, not paying attention to your needs, being overwhelmed by their own life situations. People often times don't realize the magnitude of what a person goes through until the damage has been done. They are often blinded by present things and lack of compassion.
DeleteI am very sad to hear your heart crying out like this, but trust me that even though it will be hard to get pass this, it's not impossible to overcome. We definitely can talk more to help you get through place in your life.
Well ive never had anyone to help me or really tell me i can overcome abuse.....but there are other things that come along with abuse like abandment issues, rejection, low-self worth, trust issues, etc......how do i get past these few things when there are so many......ima keep it real......im all messed up in my heart and mind and have been for years and i keep hearing u gonna get over it and that u can get through this.....CAN I REALLY???
ReplyDeleteYES YOU CAN...REALLY!!!! It takes time to get over the past. You have to deal with each issue one step at a time. It can be difficult to focus on one area when there are so many other issues. This is one of the many ways that can help, but it just doesn't stop here.
ReplyDeleteGet a sheet of paper. Write down a list of every issue. Pick three issues that you feel are important to you right now (Only THREE *smiles*). Within these three issues, try to go into detail about your feelings, what happened, concerns, etc. (if it's not too hard to write down). These are the three issues we can deal with for now and then we will work on the others, if it's ok with you?
Its ok with me. :-) just afraid to deal with it because sooo much comes along with dealing with certain issues but i will try and hope u will help me thru this. On the real i hope this and you are real because ive been dropped by so many people and i can't take tha bottom falling out again.....im already at rock bottom emotionally, mentally and spiritually and i need some realness and real love genuine kind hearted love. Thanks for what u have said already.
ReplyDeleteYou are right, there is a lot that comes along with dealing with issues. Yes you can get through it! I am a real person who deals with real issues. I've been dropped before too, so I know how that feels and I wouldn't wish that for you or my worst enemy.
DeleteYou are welcome! I'm here to help and whatever I can't do, I will make sure I get you the help you need.
Thx
ReplyDelete