I witnessed an older lady at the hospital basically crying out from the inside for help. Out of the blue, this lady began to tell me she was molested and raped by her step father from the age of 8 to 16 years old. I tried my best not to be upset; however, I was unsuccessful. This lady's mentality was that of a person who was a functional drug addict. While she was talking, you can hear the shame, the anger, the disgust, the why me, and various other emotions. Even now, this lady has not dealt with her abuse and she is an adult who wants to do better for her life, but can't because of the effects from abuse. She was grateful to be alive and able to still move on with life, despite what happen to her as a child.Everybody deals with abuse differently. Some end up being abusers, some deal with loving the opposite of what abused them, some like it and want it, and some feel that's what they deserve. NO ONE deserves to be abused!!! You have to speak up if you're being abused. Find someone that you TRUST and that can help you get out. If a person you trust tells you to just leave, that's the not the one. There must a solution to this problem. Once you leave, DO NOT go back, don't let no one talk you back, don't go back because you feel you can't make it without them. All of these are tricks of manipulation to get you back into the same place. If you do go back, it will be worse than before and it may lead to death. GET OUT & STAY OUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
YOU DO NOT DESERVE TO BE ABUSED!!!!!! YOU ARE WORTH MORE THAN THAT!!!!!!!!!!!! SEEK HELP FOR YOURSELF!!!!!!!!
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HOW DO U REALLY OVERCOME THE AFTERMATH OF IT ALL?? WHAT ARE SOME STEPS OR HELP TOOLS THAT CAN PUSH ME INTO RECOVERY FROM ALL THA ABUSE??
ReplyDeleteHere are some steps to help:
Delete1. Take responsibility for yourself.
2. Take care and love of yourself
3. Get counseling (individual, group, programs, religious)
4. Forgive
Let go of the guilt, shame, anger, bitterness, resentment, and all feelings/emotions attached. These are only four steps, but these steps take time to go through. Don't let anyone rush you through your healing process by saying you should be past this already. You are right where you need to be to deal with what has happened and in time you will be healed from the past issues.
Can i really be healed from this?? sometimes i wonder if this will ever go away? will i ever be normal? will a man ever love me tha way i deserve? Can i love him back and not treat him certain way based on my brokeness? these are things i ponder everyday and it hurts sooo much!! *Tears* i dont want this is to stop me from living life tha way i can live it. When u say take responsibility for yourself, can u explain whatchu mean by that??
ReplyDeleteTaking responsibility means doing what's necessary to provide for yourself and what you need to live.
DeleteI totally understand. You can be healed if you're willing to go through the necessary steps to get healed. You will be able love and receive love. Its tough, but its possible, it just takes patience. If a person doesn't get healed from past issues, yes, it can cause them to not love or receive love. Dealing with this is going to hurt, so don't hold back your tears and emotions while dealing with these issues. It is all apart of the healing process to feel the same emotions. If you feel the same emotions like it is happening, that lets you know that you're not healed yet. So, let the HEALING begin and allow you to blossom to a strong, free and healed individual.
healing is not easy also. i.....i....feel what happened all over again and it hurts mentally, emotionally and physically. I have to suffer with things physically because of the abuse i went thru. Every month when my cycle comes on i have to deal with TERRIBLE pain in my reproductive system because it got damaged because my STEP-FATHER wanted to start molesting me at 2!!! i have to go thru life knwing i can't have children behind abuse......this is not fair and its not easy to heal from especially when something reminds u of it EVERYDAY!!! how can i deal with whats constantly in my face!!!! THIS IS MY AFTERMATH!!!!! its hurts sooooooooooo bad and its hard and im by myself trying to get thru this! Ive been crying out all my life and now im crying without sound....my voice is so tired and weak from screaming and no one has heard me and sometimes i feel like God doesnt even hear that cry anymore even tho i knw he does. im just at tha end and im trying to deal with this but tha pain is still unbearable for me smh!!!! I feel like im goin to deal behind this pain breaking my heart until its completely broken to tha point of not functioning AT ALL!!! People judge me and say this and that and have NO IDEA what i go thru and deal with daily and make me angry and mad but also sad because i wish someone would see whats really there and tell me i can get thru this, i am loved!! u knw.
ReplyDeleteThis is a very difficult and touchy situation. It's one thing to have an experience and nothing constantly reminds, but to have this every month is very hard to deal with. First, I am sorry this happened and that you have to deal with what someone else did to you. God hears everything and sees all. Remember that the things that happen to you were not your fault. You did nothing to cause this, it was your step-father who is to blame. It will not be as easy to get healed, although there are steps that can help, you can get healed and help through this. Don't let what people say about you define who you are, you are right, they do not have an idea what you have encountered in life. Let's focus on you and what you need to get healed!!!! You are loved!!!
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